It seems fitting that as I write this the skies are heavy with rain. Proclaiming their discontent in loud crashes of thunder and menacing flashes of lightning. Today is Good Friday. Ironically named, as it is a day of silence and sorrow. A day of sadness and shame. A day marked by the death of hope. A day of lament for those of us who are lost…
Lost in the silence
Lost in the sorrow
Lost in the nothing we’ve become
Lost in the sadness
Lost in the shame
Lost in the hurt we’re running from
Today is a day for those of us whose voices have been silenced. Whose words have been stolen by the accusations of others.
Today is a day for those of us full of sorrow. For the wrongs that have been meted out by our own hands. For the forgiveness we withheld. For the grace we failed to give.
Today is a day for those of us drowning in sadness. Because relationships have been broken. Dreams have been destroyed. Lifetimes are slowly unraveling right before our eyes.
Today is a day for those of us who live in shame. Because we don’t live up to the expectations of others. Expectations of perfection. In our relationships. In our churches. Or because we no longer go to church as the church is the very place that shame was forced upon us.
Today is a day for those of us who continue to run. From the hurt. From the silence and the sorrow. From the sadness and the shame. From our own expectations of who we should be.
Today is a day for those of us who want to feel nothing. Because the feelings are overwhelming. For those of us who want to become nothing. Because being is too painful.
So we all come together at the foot of that empty cross. All of us who are weary and worn down. Where we sit silently. In the midst of our sorrow, our sadness, our shame. With others who share our hurts. With others who share our tears. With others who understand we have more questions now than answers. And we wait.
Because we once were lost…